How many times did you hear the sentence, “Do you think he’s the one?” I’m sure that most of us heard this from friends, classmates, sisters, films, television, etc. When I hear people say this, I used to roll my eyes ; but one day I found myself asking the exact question. My time had come to obsess over this question. I even googled it and read dozens of long – listed articles of non – negotiable qualities that a man must possess. But I realized over time that my man did not fit into any of the molds provided by these articles. He was his own person, and he grew all by himself into my heart.
Let me be very clear about one thing! I was incredibly challenging! I did n’t have a checklist, but I had high standards. Many friends said I would have to lower my standards and “get real” if I ever wanted to meet someone. As my friends dated and fell in love, I stood on the side rejecting dates and refusing to take their advice. I am so grateful that I never lowered my standards and ended up getting married to a man I honestly didn’t think existed.
Despite being incredibly blessed, my story is not uncommon and one – of – a – kind. Keep up your standards and try to be your best self. I won’t make a long list of qualities that every man should have. While many men think that we ladies are complicated, we want the same thing in essence. What I will do is list the reasons I have fallen in love with my husband. I feel like you’re going to relate 100 %!
1.) HE MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD!
I really love a good laugh! Who doesn’t? He appeared to be a really nice guy when we first met, but rather quiet. He was so much fun, though, on our first date! He told me stories that made me laugh so hard that I was gasping for air. As our relationship progressed, the center of everything was always laughter and joy. We were happy to be together.
2.) HIS PERSONALITY WAS VERY DIFFERENT FROM MINE
While some couples are very similar, we are not. And that’s one of the reasons we’ve been attracted to each other. He was calm, soft, and very calculated. I was a spontaneous person, a risk – taking person, and an individual. Our personalities were balancing out and allowing us to enjoy things that we never thought we would. We went out with friends because of me; because of him, we spent a quieter evening enjoying the company of each other. Opposites definitely attracts in our case.
3.) HE WAS A FANTASTIC LISTENER
I was a chatter box and he was a fantastic listener. At the end of my day, I always had stories to tell him, and he was happy to listen and ask questions.
4.) HE DIDN’T LAVISH ME WITH GIFTS
Many men feel that to gain our affection, they have to shower the girl with gifts and love tokens. For my husband and I we wanted to build our relationship on a foundation that wouldn’t change over time. If he started showering me with gifts, I’d be disappointed if that behavior declined over time. He treated me perfectly and consistently – and because of that I fell in love.
5.) HE DID NOT GIVE ME ANY REASON TO DOUBT HIM
I don’t trust people easily and I learned that time is the only way to remove doubts and build confidence. He never acted suspicious from the very beginning or gave me reason to doubt his word.
6.) HE MADE ME FEEL PROTECTED AND SECURE
I didn’t feel like I needed anyone to protect me as a young, independent woman. He made it his # 1 priority to keep me safe – he made sure that I was never again in a situation that put my safety at risk. Men have this instinctive desire to protect their loved ones, which I have greatly benefited from!
7.) HE CHALLENGED ME
Whenever I asked him for his opinion he would give it to me with pure honesty. He challenged me to do better, to do more, and to be the best I could be. He is my greatest motivator!
8.) HE WAS A HARD WORKER
When I met my husband I was impressed by his work ethic and major goals for the future. He not only had goals, but he pursued them actively and accomplished them. When we first had our first baby my husband worked 3 jobs and took public transportation, and only had about an hour or 2 rest before he had to go to work again. That didn’t stop him for working harder. Even after all that he still managed to make time for us.
9.) HE WAS WISE
He didn’t make important decisions quickly and he didn’t give his opinion quickly. His actions have always been thought out carefully and deliberately. I was a fast – paced and enthusiastic thinker, prone to making quick decisions. This was one of my strengths, but it was my weakness as well. His wisdom encouraged me to slow down and take some time to reflect on my next move.
10.) WE BECAME BEST FRIENDS
We were good friends at the beginning, but not best friends. Although we spent a lot of time together, we still didn’t really understand each other.
But we became the best of friends as time passed. We were in our happy place when we were together. We built up, helped each other, comforted each other. We were still best friends in times when we didn’t feel the butterflies and intense passion.
One of the most important and life-changing decisions you’ll ever make is to choose the person you’ll spend your life with. They are going to change you in ways that you never thought possible–for better or worse. We have grown and learned to overcome many bad habits that ruin relationships and avoid them.
Choosing him was my life’s best decision. He taught me so many valuable life and love lessons. Even though as individuals we have grown and changed, he has not yet changed from the person I was initially in love with. He’s all the things I’ve listed above, except better.